Work-Life Balance

Do you ever feel like your work life is spinning out of control?  I know how I feel when my work-life balance is out of whack, stressed, and uncreative.  I have trouble solving problems because they are overwhelming, and I feel tired all the time, but cannot sleep.  Sometimes, a sense of panic sets in. Completing a simple task or learning something new seems out of the question.  Burnout can set in; a nervous breakdown can occur.

With modern technology, emails, texts, and notifications come at us at a rapid-fire rate at all hours of the day and night. Sometimes I feel like I am playing ping pong with interruptions flying at me like the tiny ball, and I barely have enough time to hit them away with my paddle. Meanwhile, I am running in place, trying to stay focused and productive on the tasks that my job requires, but accomplishing little because I am too wound-up and anxious.

On the other hand, when I maintain a good work-life balance, I am more productive.  I can problem-solve creatively, get my work done in less time, and inspire others.  I feel mentally stable and excited to learn new things.  Enthusiasm flows through my veins, giving me animation and power to conquer what needs to be done in a creative manner.

I have seen both sides of the fence and I can emphatically say that the one is definitely better than the other.

Working all the time

When I lived in Los Angles and ran my own direct sales business, I worked all the time.  During the day I did paperwork and sales calls.  I held my sales demonstrations on evenings and weekends.  When my husband went back to school, I took a second job where I drove around town delivering office products to businesses during the day.  My life was so out of whack.  I was stressed and on the verge of a mental breakdown.

When we first moved to Northern California, I didn’t know what to do with any amount of free time.  I called my grandmother every day while I detoxed from overwork and overstimulation.  I vowed never to get that way again.

Now, there were times when my children were little and I was working full time that I could not stick with my promise to myself.  I became stressed and overwhelmed when the kids were babies mostly because I was hormonal and not sleeping.  But even when you can’t control family life, you can still control work life.

Fast forward to the present day.  Like many of you, I have been hit with the realities of working at home during Covid-19. I need to remind myself of the strategies that have succeeded in the past and apply them to bring a sense of balance to my life today.

Strategy 1: Make a schedule:

Even before the governors “Stay at Home Order”, my job had a capacity to spiral out-of-control into a situation where I worked all the time.  I am an independent study teacher for a local charter school. My students have a flexible schedule and can do their schoolwork any time during the day or night.  They also complete assignments on weekends.  Conceivably, I can get a phone call with a question about writing at 10:00 p.m.  Or a text wondering when our next appointment is at midnight.  So, I consciously need to make an effort to keep things under control by creating my own schedule and informing others of when I am available.

I begin with a master calendar.  I schedule at least 40 hours for work, fill in activities for my kids, and mark time-off to spend with family and friends.  Having a plan allows me to assess activities ahead of time and check my calendar before adding new commitments.  This makes it easier to consider obligations and keep the various elements of my life in perspective.

Sometimes work creeps into family life and vice versa.  But here’s where an attempt at balance is important.  Don’t let your work inch forward so far that it takes over your entire life.  I try to keep in mind that my family is the number one priority.  When I don’t put them first, my value system is out of whack, and I make myself mentally and physically sick.  Work has to stay within the boundaries I set for it. Now that doesn’t mean shirk I responsibility.  Work is good for me.  I find it interesting and it pays the bills.  I constantly search for that sweet spot between occupation, family-time, and leisure.

Strategy 2: Be as productive as you can while you work:

Stop multitasking.  Instead, group like tasks together and conquer them one at a time.  Do you have a lot of phone calls to make? List them and make them one right after the other.

This is easier said than done because by nature, I am random in my approach to work.  I like to start all kinds of activities at the beginning of the day and jump from task to task, hoping to tie them all up by the end of the day.  Studies show this is stressful and not the most productive way to conquer your duties.

Even though it doesn’t come naturally, I organize my activities by days of the week.  I establish office days, direct instruction days, and out and about meeting days.  I group tasks accordingly and prepare for each day the evening prior.  The process includes a look at my schedule, gathering supplies, grouping tasks, setting a time to complete them, and making a lunch if I will be away from home.

I receive texts and emails every day and hour of the week. To organize the barrage, I set different tones for the various alerts on my phone and computer.  I have one tone for a text from my family and another sound signals work.  I have a third notification for emails.   Unless there’s an emergency, I do not stop what I am doing to answer texts and emails.  I group them together and answer them all at once, every hour or so.  It is a much more practical approach.

Strategy 3: Set limits:

Communicate:

Inform others of your schedule so that they can know when it is appropriate to contact you. My students know that I am available to work with them from 9:00-4:00 p.m. Monday through Friday.  I let them know they can email me any time, but unless we have an appointment, I will get back to them when I can (sometime during regular work hours). My family knows when I have appointments and class time.  They understand when I am interruptible and when I prefer to be left alone to get stuff done.

Take those much-needed breaks.

I do a lot of work in front of the computer. So I find I need to get up out of my chair at least once an hour to stretch and walk around or I get backaches and headaches.  I take a midmorning break and a lunch break where I purposely do not look at a screen.  Around 4:00 every day, I try to get outside to exercise or go for a walk.

Don’t put it down, put it away.

When your workday ends, clean up. This is especially important if you are working from home because it’s difficult to relax when you see everything out.  If you can put a desk in a closet, then shut the closet door.  If your laptop was on the kitchen table, put it away before dinner.  File the papers so they’re not lying around the top of the coffee table.  Otherwise, when you look at the stuff, the grind will be on your mind.

Even God rested on the seventh day.

Take a day off every week. I often work on Saturday, but rarely Sunday.  I need a day to “rest” and go to church.  If I choose to work over the weekend, I program my emails to go out on Monday mornings at 8:00 instead of over the weekend. I want to respect the family time of others, just as I expect them to consider mine.

Unplug

Silence text messages and email notifications in the evening.  I set my phone on “do not disturb” from 9:00 pm to 9:00 am every day. Only immediate family members can ring through.

Stop your brain from looping.

Do you ever have an idea, an appointment, or a task that you don’t want to forget?  When a task pops into my head, I immediately write it down because if I don’t, it will loop around and around in my mind as my brain attempts to remember it.

If a task comes to me during the day, I write it on my daily scheduling calendar on the section of the day and time I think I can accomplish it.  When an idea emerges when I am driving the car, I pull over and make a note on my phone.  Often thoughts arrive in the middle of the night; therefore, I have a pad of paper and a pen next to my bed so I can write them down.  I don’t even turn on the light.  I just jot down the note and go right back to sleep. Once it is written, I know I don’t have to think about it anymore and it gives my brain a rest. In the morning, I take care of it.

Strategy 4: Share family responsibilities:

We all have to squeeze in medical appointments and haircuts.  Then there’s grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning, bill payment, and car maintenance.  As these tasks arise, see if you can divvy them up between family members.  If the chores are split, then no one person is stuck with all the work and there is more time to spend together as a family.

Strategy 5: Get away from it all:

By the end of the day, my mind needs a break from mental decisions and tasks.  Have fun with friends and family.  Play games. Laugh a lot. Sometimes I use audiobooks from Audible to take a cerebral pause.  When I drive from meeting to meeting, I listen in the car.  When I go for a walk alone, I listen on the trail.

I try to get outside for physical exercise, daily.  I often meet friends for a walk on the River Trail or do activities with family.  To me, this is healing therapy.

On school holidays or special occasions like my anniversary, I make an effort to get out of town.  It’s good to go on a restful vacation.  I think it puts things into perspective.  I return inspired and more productive.

Strategy 6: Carefully consider additional commitments:

As opportunities for volunteer work arise or other hobbies pique your interest, run the idea by a friend or family member before jumping in.  I ask my husband if he thinks I am too busy to take on a new task.  I weigh his suggestions and input before taking on new obligations.

When you volunteer, make it different from what you do for work.  I am a teacher, so naturally, I was asked to teach Sunday School at church.  Teaching six days a week and prepping on a seventh caused major burnout, and I had to take a break from that extra day a week.  Instead, I greet people coming to church on Sunday mornings and direct kids to their classrooms.

Strategy 7: Take care of yourself

Make sure you are getting a good night’s sleep.  Eat well.  Exercise daily.  Drink lots of water.

The Bottom Line:

We want to be useful, productive, loving people, and we don’t want to get sick.  We want to live as well as work.  In the movie, The Shining, the main character, Jack Torrance says, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.”  This means that without time off from work, a person becomes both bored and boring. Longer periods of time on the job do not make you more productive, having work-life balance does.  Stay organized, set limits, take time out for a break to laugh, and rest.  You’ll be healthier and feel happier.  Even your boss will find that it makes a huge difference in your perspective and productivity.

What strategies do you have for work-life balance?  Please share your strategies and ideas below.